I got into an argument with this hippie chick about global warming
I call her a hippie chick but really she's more like a Republican who smokes weed
She's Ann Coulter with a drug problem
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And she was saying that the leading cause of global warming isn't the exhaust from cars
Or factories
It's actually methane gas
Which comes from cows farting
Just a bunch of cows sitting around shitting their pants
That is what's going to ruin the planet
According to her
And you know
I'm not an expert here
But I think if it means saving the planet
Maybe we should stop feeding these cows Mexican food
Maybe the mondo burrito isn't the way to go here
My mom is looking forward to global warming
She says it won't be long before everyone knows what menopause feels like
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