Saturday, November 12, 2011

TOM SWIFTIES

1. “Of course, I’m a geometry teacher,”

He said obtusely

2. “I just tend 2 my flock,”

He said sheepishly

3. “Then turn on the air conditioner,”

He said coolly

4. “Do you ever come up 4 air,”

She asked breathlessly

5. “Behold, my Kingdom,”

He said majestically

6. “Make a list,”

He stated categorically

7. “Not a single bump,”

He said smoothly

8. “The sun is shining,”

He said brightly

9. “It’s pitch black in here,”

He said darkly

10. “Lotta room in here,”

He said loosely

11. “What’s next,”

He asked systematically

12. “I’m dying,”

He croaked

13. “It’s crushing me,”

He groaned heavily

14. “It weighs next to nothing,”

He said lightly

15. “That’s totally random,”

He replied haphazardly

16. “You can go now,”

He said dismissively

17. “It’s freezing,”

He stated icily

18. “You’re way off target,”

He replied aimlessly

19. “It could use some lubrication,”

He stated dryly

20. “I’m cumming,”

He ejaculated

21. “Are you sure,”

She asked doubtfully

22. “They crucified him,”

She said crossly

23. “I win,”

He shouted victoriously

24. “There is no hope,”

He said despairingly

25. “Do you really believe that,”

He asked cynically

26. “This is where we bury the dead,”

He replied cryptically

27. “Because I’m shy,”

He responded timidly

28. “Why,”

He asked questioningly

29. “But it’s my kitchen,”

He countered

30. “This is the best spaghetti ever,”

He said saucily

31. “I’m a dolphin trainer,”

He answered flippantly

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